The Love Dare, Day 5

Love is not rude...

"he who blesses his friends with a loud voice early in the morning, it will be reckoned a curse to him"- Proverbs 27:14

Honestly i don't even want to do this anymore. I had to make myself. He has forgotten to even read his parts the last two days, even with my reminding him and I'm just angry that it doesn't seem to matter to him as much as it does to me. I know i need to do this for me and not for him, but im not totally there yet. But I'm doing it anyways.

Rude. Funny because once again i feel high and mighty because i honestly am not rude to him, well to his face anyway. Wow how horrible i am, i keep waiting for me to learn my lesson. lol.

Ok so the book says "when a man is driven by love, he intentionally behaves in a way that's more pleasant for his wife to be around. If she desires to love him, she purposefully avoids things that frustrate him or cause him discomfort." When you have good manners, it expresses to your mate 'I value you enough to exercise some self control around you. I want to be a person who's a pleasure to be with' (:( )

The example is you rant and rave all around the house yelling and being unpleasant, but as soon as the door bell rings your a different person, answering it with a smile and kindness.

There are two main reasons people are rude: ignorance and selfishness. It goes on to say that if you think your not the rude one, answer these questions:

1. How does your spouse feel about the way you speak and act around them? He thinks i am kind and sweet.
   
2. How does your behavior affect your mate's sense of worth and self-esteem? I am constantly raising his self-esteem by building him up.
   
3. Would your mate say you're a blessing, or that your condescending and embarrassing? Im thinking he would say i am a blessing. sometimes.
   

Love is not rude but lifts you to a higher standard. Here are 3 guiding principles when it comes to good mate manners (lol):

1. Guard the Golden Rule. Treat your mate the same way you want to be treated.
2. No double standards. Be as considerate to your spouse as you are to strangers and co-workers.
3. Honor requests. Consider what your husband or wife already asked you to do or not to do. If in doubt, then ask.

Love Dare Day 5 Dare:

ASK YOUR SPOUSE TO TELL YOU THREE THINGS THAT CAUSE HIM OR HER TO BE UNCOMFORTABLE OR IRRITATED WITH YOU. YOU MUST DO SO WITHOUT ATTACKING THEM OR JUSTIFYING YOUR BEHAVIOR. THIS IS FROM THEIR PROSPECTIVE ONLY.

He isnt home yet, so i will update later on.
UPDATE:
He is so cute lol. So i had him think of the three things while he was at school last night. He comes home with "nothing really bothers me that you do except...". 1. When I do things for him (you know trying to make his life easier by getting things for him and doing things for him, lol i don't get it either) And, 2. When I leave the cabinets & the hallway door open. He hits his head a lot on the cabinets. Ok seems easy enough to correct. I will just be a lazy cabinet door closer...hahahaha.